What's behind the banner

An illuminating light guiding my path on a dark forest while am gently minding my steps on the savage environment.. Am not afraid, coz am not alone.. with me is one great companion who stays at my side all thoughout my journey.

A year ago now when I met this "bestia", as my boyfriend used to call him.. A huge pet, with a huge heart, this is Bubbu, a medium-sized, 50-kilo Rottweiler.. our lovely "baby". While I was thinking on the concept of my banner, I already had in mind to incorporate the concept of savagery with someone who stays with you in the darkness. And that is that dog illustrated above..He's one great pet who proved that dog is a man's bestfriend.

I had some dog pets years ago.. but I've never had this emotional attachment I had with my baby Bubbu (to think he is not really mine). He was always there at the door ready to greet you when you enter the house. Who was always there beside you at the table waiting for his portion of my food. Who was always there to accompany you while watching tv.. and kiss you goodnight before you go to bed. Dont ever forget to give him a cuddle when you arrive home, or else even when you're seated at the toilet, he will come to you to give his sweet cuddles. His leg over your leg, and a sweet lick on your face! You wont hear him bark angrily unless you try to take away the bone he's playing at, or the shoe of my boyfriend he has in his mouth..that's one big trouble!! I always had to look for the other pair of my shoe before leaving the house because it was Bubbu who robbed my shoe and hid it somewhere. One thing I wont forget about him is, how he felt bad as well when am feeling bad.. how he cried when he heard me cry.. and trying to comfort me. This memory breaks my heart and makes me cry more coz my baby Bubbu wont be there for me, for us..anymore..in as much as he wants.

While America was celebrating the birth of democracy.. we were crying for the death of our great companion. Being with him on his last few breaths, almost had taken mine as well.

I maybe one of the few people he met during the last year of his life.. but am proud to be one of those people he loved and cared for.. I hate to show am feeling bad too for his loss. But it really breaks my heart when I think of our lovely memories together.. time maybe short, but it was one of the great times I had.

I wont forget you Bubbu. You will always be my huge lovely "baby".

Un fiore selvaggio

I've faced the hardest times you could imagine.
And many times my eyes fought back the tears.
And when my youthful world was about to fall in
Each time my slender shoulders,
bore the weight of all my fears.
And the sorrow no one hears,
Still rings in midnight silence
In my ears...

Let me cry, for am lady
Let me dream, for am child
Let the rain fall down upon me
Am free and gentle flower, growing wild

And if by chance that someone should hold me,
let him hold me for a time
And if allowed but one possession,
He'll will pick me from the garden to be his.
Only his...

Be careful how you touch me, for I’ll be awaken
And sleeps the only freedom that I know
And when you walk into my eyes, you won’t believe
The way am always payin,
For a debt I never owe
And the silent wind still blows, That only I can hear,
And so I go...

L'Aquila Nightmare Quake

It was one quiet night at 3:32 am when a violent earthquake with a magnitude of 5.8 Richter scale hit the center of Italy, the Abruzzo. The epicenter shock was registered in L'Aquila, where a lot of different structures and thousands of people were remained trapped on the distress. Updated number of deaths is raised to 229, in which some of these are children. At the moment the number of victims is still tentative, 1,500 people wounded, 34 missing and 17,000 others are receiving help from emergency crews.


Registered shock readings are given below:

06/04/2009 03:32:39 | Mag. 5.8

after shocks:

06/04/2009 04:14:10 | Mag. 3.3
06/04/2009 04:25:45 | Mag. 3.3
06/04/2009 04:27:46 | Mag. 3.9
06/04/2009 04:31:33 | Mag. 3.4
06/04/2009 04:37:04 | Mag. 4.6
06/04/2009 04:44:32 | Mag. 3.2
06/04/2009 04:55:33 | Mag. 3.3
06/04/2009 05:16:04 | Mag. 2.8
06/04/2009 05:23:10 | Mag. 2.8
06/04/2009 05:30:59 | Mag. 2.8
06/04/2009 05:43:16 | Mag. 3.1
06/04/2009 05:56:45 | Mag. 3.9
06/04/2009 06:02:27 | Mag. 2.7
06/04/2009 06:08:45 | Mag. 3
06/04/2009 06:16:40 | Mag. 3.2
06/04/2009 06:47:53 | Mag. 3.7
06/04/2009 07:15:28 | Mag. 3.1
06/04/2009 09:17:10 | Mag. 3.9
06/04/2009 11:59:29 | Mag. 3.1
06/04/2009 12:36:18 | Mag. 3.5
06/04/2009 15:14:04 | Mag. 3.2
06/04/2009 18:38:09 | Mag. 4
06/04/2009 23:56:53 | Mag. 3.8
07/04/2009 08:15:07 | Mag. 3
07/04/2009 10:00:52 | Mag. 3.2
07/04/2009 11:24:43 | Mag. 3.6
07/04/2009 11:26:28 | Mag. 4.7
07/04/2009 11:30:56 | Mag. 3.5
07/04/2009 12:29:10 | Mag. 3.2
07/04/2009 14:29:00 | Mag. 3.3
07/04/2009 19:47:37 | Mag. 5.3
07/04/2009 23:34:29 | Mag. 4.2
07/04/2009 23:39:06 | Mag. 3.7

Details and pictures of the survivors found will be posted tomorrow. Now, let's just hope and pray that these continuous after shocks will be over. Enough for L'Aquila.

Go Natural

Have you ever wondered whether there was another way of retaining the your natural beauty without spending much and making experiments on all the anti-aging beauty products that you can find on the market today? Well, there is, and it's in your kitchen. Well they may be cheap, but that doesn’t mean they don’t work. When you make your own beauty products you are in control of which ingredients to use.
We all know that natural oils and other natural ingredients are better for your skin than chemically manufactured ones, so take advantage of this and start making your own home made beauty products today. I wanna share with you some of my simple recipes you can use to get started.

Click on a photo to see the associated recipe(s) on the categories shown below.

Hair Care Tips

I was born with a nice head of thick, shiny coarse hair. But due to some factors like change of climate and over exposure to sunlight my hair has become dry and brittle. Every woman wants healthy, strong and shiny hair, so am sharing with you my personal recipe on how to maintain your crown of glory.

Creating my own recipes not only saves money but allows me to do treatments more often and experiment to find what works best.




Deep Hair Conditioning

2 tablespoons of mayonnaise
2 tablespoons of olive oil
2 eggyolks

Mix the ingredients in a bowl and gently massage on your scalp and throughout your damp hair for 10 minutes. Cover your head with a plastic or shower cap for 20 minutes and rinse well. It could leave your hair a bit greasy on the following day but on the next days you'll have a very smooth hair. Do once or twice a month.


Hair Mask

1 cup fresh lemon juice, or
1 cup apple cider vinegar

After you shampoo your hair, pour 1 cup fresh lemon juice or vinegar through hair,massage and rinse with water. Apply your usual conditioner and wash with water. It will remove all the dirt and your hair will be shine sparkling. Repeat after 2 weeks.


Beer Conditioning

1 can or bottle of beer

Pour 1 can onto hair and rinse. Apply conditioner if hair is dry. Beer must be fresh, not flat. Safe to use everyday.



Skin Care Tips

When you look in the mirror and you see a dull and dry flaky skin, it may be time for you to do some exfoliation to get rid of those dead cells clogging up the top layer of your skin to bring the hidden more youthful looking skin.
Some younger people with skin problems should take care not to over-exfoliate, as I have found that those suffering from skin problems think that daily exfoliating or scrubbing every three or four days, will help to rid their skin from impurities.
Unfortunately, it’s bad! Over-exfoliating or scrubbing can aggravate the problem instead or alleviating it, since the skin is irritated instead of being assisted along to help heal itself.
But for those amongst us that are facing the aging battle, exfoliation of the skin, helps with blood circulation and the removal of the dead skin cells that can cause it to look dull and dry. Exfoliating can be done every weekly, and in some cases twice.


Facial Scub

2-3 teaspoons raw oats
1/4 teaspoon of lemon
drops of olive oil
honey

Crush the oats into smaller bits either by hand or in a grinder. Mix the dry oats with pure honey and lemon until they form a smooth mixture. Add more honey as needed. Then add 1 to 2 drops of olive oil to the mixture.

Apply the mixture to your face, neck and throat. You might even want to use some on your hands to slough off dry or dead skin. Be careful not to scrub vigorously. Use a circular motion and work the scrub into your forehead, cheeks, chin and neck. Avoid the eye area completely. This skin is delicate and should never be exfoliated with a scrub.

Rinse the face using warm water. You do not want the water to be hot as this opens pores and can damage the skin. Keep the water warm and finish with a nice cool splash of water to close pores.



Egg White Mask

1 egg

Crack open an egg in half and pour the egg white into a small bowl or plastic container.

Using a brush, or your finger, apply the egg white all over your face, avoiding your eyes and mouth areas. Tear holes for eyes and nose and mouth on a piece of 2-ply thin tissue, and put over the face. For better results, i usually tear the tissues into smaller pieces and put on different parts of my face. Next, re-apply more egg white over the tissues. Wait for it to be dried, and peel off the tissues in a upward direction from your face. Voila! a lot of blackheads are remove at the same time!


SKIN MOISTURIZERS

SKIN TYPES

Dry skin is best treated with rich oils such as sesame or olive oil.

Normal to oily skin should be treated with light oils such as jojoba, grapeseed, or avocado.

Homemade Moisturizer for dry skin types:

Thoroughly cleanse your skin, and apply olive oil or vitamin E oil directly in the evening.

Olive oil, lemon and eggs are great natural skin moisturizers. Apply and let stand for 15 minutes and rinse with lukewarm water.



Body Care Tips

Body Scrub

1 cup of sugar
lemon juice

Mix it altogether then use a soft soap like dove lather on body then use your sugar scrub. Works wonder!


Relaxing Scrub

2 cups coarsely ground coffee
1/2 cup raw sugar
2 teaspoon of milk
few drops of lemon

Mix all the ingredients and apply all over the body while in the shower. Rinse and follow with a light cleansing soap.


Home made Tan

Instead of buying expensive tanning oils filled with chemicals that you can't pronounce, perhaps you should try making your own at home. It's easier than you might think, and lets you be sure as to exactly what it is that you're putting on your body.

The first thing that you'll need when making your own tanning oil is the oil itself. This will serve as the base for your finished product, and has the dual purpose of keeping your skin from drying out as well as helping you shield you from some of the damaging aspects of the sunlight.

Olive oil
tincture of iodine
carrot juice

Add few drops of tincture of iodine to your olive oil. The tincture of iodine will help to protect your skin from sunburn, and can help the olive oil to produce that golden tan that you're seeking.

If you want a darker tan, you might want to include a little bit of carrot juice in with your mix. The vitamins and minerals in the juice can be quite good for your skin, and carrot juice is often used as an ingredient in tanning amplifiers to help focus the sun's rays and create darker tones. You need to be careful not to use too much carrot juice, however; a few drops will likely do you. In addition to the fact that too much could cause you to get a sunburn (because it would focus the sun's rays on your tender skin), the natural hue of the carrot juice could temporarily dye your skin orange. Even though you're trying to get some color, that's probably not the color that you're going for.

Once you've got your simple tanning oil together, shake it vigorously to mix the ingredients and apply to your skin before laying out in the sun. As the oil doesn't contain ingredients to waterproof it, you need to reapply after getting out of the water or after about an hour of sun exposure (possibly sooner, if you've been sweating heavily.) Additionally, make sure that you're not putting on too much of the oil... it should be rubbed into the skin, and shouldn't create an oily layer on top of it.



... to be continued.

Chi è?? Kledi Kadiu.. aiuto!

Sto per cadere in amore... ti saluto Gatusso mio, mi dispiace.




That very masculine look, with penetrating eyes melts me.. I don't regret that one boring night (without my laptop), I went to bed late to watch "Amici".

That stunning look, sturdy built, with a touch of gentleness in his very soul.. I admired him how he protected her partner from being "nude" during the show when the strap was accidentally detached from her skimpy dress..

I'll see you tom on TV, goodnight!

What's behind those eyes

Those eyes... those eyes... what is it about those intense, magnetic eyes?

The phrase ‘still water runs deep’ is particularly appropriate here, because although the surface of the water may be calm, there is always a strong sense of the mysterious and unknown and often frightening depths lying below the surface. At the bottom of the well lies rotten, decayed and decaying detritus which most of you, unless you are Scorpios, would rather not think about. There is an intense magnetism about those eyes, and people tend to be either strongly attracted or strongly repelled by its atmosphere of inscrutability and controlled power.

Those eyes have disconcerting gift that can make icy shivers run up your spine. It's a peculiar form of black magic, and they weave it so expertly it can seem like real witchcraft. When those eyes gaze at you it feels almost impossible to break away from that intensely hypnotic stare. That steady look often makes people nervous and they have to look away to gather their thoughts. That gaze is so intense it almost feels like they bore deeply and look into your very soul.

Though those works their magic in strange and secret ways, those haunting eyes will always gaze at you with basic honesty, even while they remain just beyond the reach of human under­standing.

This is me, "magnetic".. as the "capricorn man" used to describe me.

Getting Ready for Summer

Global crisis couldn't stop the people to spend their vacation, enjoy the sunny side of life during summer, and to go on nice beaches outside the country, Maldives or Caribbean. But some people may want to hold their budget and spend a nice vacation atleast within the country.

But am not gonna discuss about global economy nor how to spend vacation with a tight budget.

Gyms are now getting full of those who want to shed excess fats and be atleast in proper shape to fit well on their bathing suits. A lot of people especially the women are getting ready to bare off some skin for summer.

Workout in a gym is one activity that I really miss to do. I was before a "gym addict", spending 2-3 hours of workout and aerobic dancing a day atleast 4 times a week. But due to a tight schedule, I could no longer go atleast even once. But I believe that I dont need to get trimmed a lot or else I'll be just skin and bones. Within 3 months I already lost 3 kls by just eating oats at least once a day, 3 or 4 times a week. But take note that am a potato chips and chocolate (with almonds) monster. So maybe, if I could only refrain myself from eating those.. how can you imagine me? Too thin? ahh meno male!

This week I started with my vow to get a regular exercise since I couldn't engage myself for a workout or atleast do any sport. I need to flatten and get some muscles on my abs, trim some fats on inner thighs (the usual problem of the women, shape up the arms, legs and shoulders. Unfortunately, I dont have any gym stuff in the house. I just use a foamed mat to have my floor exercises.

Let's start with the ABDOMINALS.

Lower Abdominals

1. Full leg raises. 16 counts, three times.
http://www.shapefit.com/abs-exercises-flat-bench-lying-leg-raises.html

2. Scissor kicks. I do it on 2 variations. One is with huge cuts, 16 counts, three times. Another one is with small cuts but with one time count of 28.
http://www.shapefit.com/abs-exercises-scissor-kicks.html

3. Bicyle Exercise. This is my favorite. This works also for the upper abs and obliques.
http://exercise.about.com/od/abs/ss/abexercises.htm

Upper Abdominals:

1. Tuck Crunches. 16 counts, three times.
http://www.http://www.blogger.com/post-edit.g?blogID=4107563651348359058&postID=5026075575581129728shapefit.com/abs-exercises-tuck-crunches.html

There are a lot of variations to try but am not too devoted enough to try some more. On these specified exercises, I think I could gain a pleasing result.

LEGS and BUTT

1. Chair Squat. 16 counts, three times
http://z.about.com/d/exercise/1/0/R/Z/squatdbs_small.jpg

2. Lunges. 16 counts on each leg, three times
http://exercise.about.com/od/exerciseworkouts/ss/bestbuttexercis_3.htm

Before I tried as well a bit of weightlifting and reached about a 100-pound record (almost double my weight). Wow, cant believe I was able to do that. At first I opt to try that but my trainor was very insistent and convincing that I wont get a muscular frame. He's right, I did get nice toned legs, no more.. no less. Un peccato, I should find time to go in a gym for this exercise.

SHOULDERS

1. Overhead press. 16 counts, three times
http://exercise.about.com/od/exerciseworkouts/ss/shoulderexercis_4.htm

2. Lateral raises. 16 counts, three times
http://exercise.about.com/od/exerciseworkouts/ss/shoulderexercis_2.htm

Due to my limited time to do these exercises, I dont usually follow the "three-times" repetition. When I feel tired, once is enough... Abby is a lazy bum.

How I wish to start doing some sports with my boyfriend every weekend. Actually we'll start with pool swimming this weekend. Hoping that we'll be able to convince his dad to join us so it'll be more fun. And hopefully on the following weeks we'll do tennis. I had a basic training before (t'was 12 years ago) but barely recall nothing. But I'll have my bf as my personal trainer and hope to learn again as fast as I can so we could enjoy the sport together. None of these two are my sports, but learning is a fun thing especially when you share it with special someone.

My winter ends with the fresh breeze of the sea

                                                   Finale Ligure

Staying at the seaside is very common during the scorching days of summer. I've never been at the seaside during winter but I know some people who did stay and said it was nice too. But how can you enjoy the sea without the sun, when all you can feel is cold? Not too ideal for me.

Winter is ending (wheeew, thanks! goodbye to jackets and scarves) and now daytime is lengthen a bit and am starting to feel heat when I stay under the sun.. but, with my jacket on. What a wonderful feeling of serenity! I've found myself lying on the sand with eyes closed and doing nothing but hearing the sound of waves. I never thought I'd enjoy this stay on the seaside on these last few days of winter. I guess a lighter jacket could help atleast to cover me from the cold air and mild heat of the sun.

This is exactly what I want, nice weather. Not too cold neither too hot. Getting tan at this period is not a good idea coz you couldn't bare off to show some skin. Too early. But this is a very nice period for some hours of walk along the seashore to get some fresh air.

In a few more days, flowers will start to bloom, trees will show off their leaves and pollen will start to scatter everywhere.

Goodbye to this bad winter season and let's welcome altogether the blooming spring of 2009!

When the Scorpion met the Capricornian

I must admit something has changed in my life from the day I've found myself fallen for this Capricorn man. I remember one time, I was browsing on the net and found some zodiac-related articles. Am not a fan of zodiac nor believe in Astrology. But when I started reading those articles, I've found out how they are shockingly true, in a way.

Horoscope is not meant to limit what can happen, but to help us understand what has happened and prepare for what will happen.

"When Scorpio and Capricorn make a love match, they get an opportunity to not only enjoy a loving relationship and learn the value of being a pair, but also to grow and mature as individuals. These two may be wary about sharing themselves with one another at first, and this emotional caution may dampen the initial impact of this relationship. These two tend to be a bit cautious (Capricorn) and pensive (Scorpio), and it takes a while for them to feel comfortable with a significant other. Though they may be shy of getting involved and not the quickest to trust and share, these two Signs will discover that they can have quite a profound connection - one of friendship and deep loyalty. Scorpio is a strong individual, an extremely good friend, a formidable enemy, and prone to intense likes and dislikes. Scorpio lives in the world of black and white. Scorpio has little time for superficial people, places or things. In romance or business or both, this is a powerful combination, one of the best matches in the Zodiac. You have a comfortable and easy affection between you, as if you already know each other well. And, if Mars and Venus favour you, the bedroom will be steamy.

The Goat provides a key element that is difficult to find, a partner you can rely on. Thus, Scorpio you'll be tempted to reveal yourself in all your seductive and passionate glory. For a proud and secretive creature, this is a risk. This relationship requires trust and commitment. The Scorpion often likes to taste the whole banquet of life, where the Goat will be more conservative. But, if you two declare loyalty, you'll be an unstoppable force. Scorpio prefers deep commitment, deep conversation and deep thoughts. If Scorpio can't tell it like it is, Scorpio prefers to keep quiet. It should be mentioned that Scorpio has quite a few secrets. Scorpio has forgiveness issues that tend to make personal relationships challenging. Much can be learned when a Scorpio and Capricorn get together - and the lessons they learn, while difficult at times to endure, are worth the trouble they might cause. From their stable, capable Capricorn mate, Scorpio can learn to bring their overheated emotions into control. Capricorn must be careful, though, not to seem too emotionally shallow when levelling any criticism on their sensitive love. Detached comments can backfire with Scorpios: They desire depth, intense feeling and the utmost in sincerity in all situations -- most especially in love! Capricorn, so busy with achieving and with how others perceive them sometimes fails to take a chance with their emotions. From Scorpio, Capricorn will learn the value of looking below the surface of things, the rich pleasure that can come from deeply knowing another person. Both Signs share a love of committing to a task. If they decide a relationship is their next big goal to attain, there's no stopping these two.

Remember that the Goat will have no patience with a Scorpion that wants to play the field. Unleash the fanatical desire that lurks in your depths and the goatish one will soak it up. Mars and Pluto rule the Scorpion. Conservative Saturn rules the Goat. You can both approach things with determination and realism. Neither of you is scared of tin tacks! You share a mutual sense of reserve, but each of you will secretly enjoy the fact your other half can penetrate the mystery. Watch that a tendency to jealousy and possessiveness on both sides doesn't get out of proportion, for both your signs will exact revenge. The Scorpion and the Goat who fall out will need good lawyers. Scorpio has proven the ability to hold on. Scorpio's staying power is second to none. Now Scorpio needs to learn to let go. Every day Scorpio needs to find something to sell, give away, throw out or burn. If Scorpio wants to get the most out of life, Scorpio needs to let go of old crap, literally, figuratively, and most of all, psychologically.

Essentially, you're cautious, steadfast and reserved. Even as a child, your personality was probably mature for your years. With any luck your life will get better and your responsibilities will become more to your liking as you mature. We all have our cycles, and you have one that is sure and steady to the top. You only fail when you give up. Never, never, never, never, never give up. You were made for management and leadership. Your ambitions are only limited by your self-esteem. Planning and work will pay off. Be sure to ask for a fair price for your efforts. If you negotiate beforehand, you eliminate problems that may otherwise occur. The elemental Water of Scorpio is well matched with the Goat's Earth. You can both be practical and share your feelings, but you may have to watch getting bogged down. Keep things fresh. Scorpio can help the more reserved Goat open up new depths of feeling. In return, the Goat brings practical assistance and a companionship that lifts you to determined and constructive action.

The Planets Mars and Pluto rule Scorpio, and the Planet Saturn rules Capricorn. Mars and Pluto represent aggression, courage, sexual energy, rebirth and renewal. Saturn teaches the great lessons in life -- hard work, diligence, ambition and responsibility. These three Planets can combine in the Signs to form an industrious union bound by Scorpio's fierce emotion and Capricorn's ambitious action. This is a dynamic team for business, sure, but they all that achieving energy could translate well to affection and love. You're a Fixed Sign, Scorpio, brimming with loyal determination and you're drawn to make the best use of joint resources. The Goat is a Cardinal Sign and is ambitious. Goats love control, but point out to them the most effective way to do something and they'll always give you a hearing. As long as you discuss plans, all will be well. Share your secrets. Don't hold back from the Goat. Capricorns can be strangely canny if you're hiding something. The two of you can be happy in family, business or romance. Under the right stars, this can be a long lasting and successful union. It's powerful, exciting and enduring."

WARNING: The best match up for these two in the zodiac. Keep jealousy and games out of the picture or lose your best companion forever. Capricorn gets better with age and is very much attracted to a prestigious lifestyle. Scorpio needs to understand how important success is to Capricorn and Capricorn needs to be less judgmental of Scorpio.

The relationship will get hard to maintain only under one circumstance i.e. if there is a tiff between the two. In case of a conflict, things will get worse even if the matter is trivial. Since neither of them would give up under any stance, resolving even a small fight will be a tough job. However, on the love front, the base of trust, loyalty and care would thrive for the entire life of the couple. Scorpio and Capricorn would form excellent rapport with each other, understanding one another perfectly and appreciating the same values and directions.

A Scorpio woman and Capricorn man make the perfect love match. They would complement each other perfectly, balancing any and every kind of difficulties. A Scorpio female and a Capricorn male would be next to each other even during serious fights and arguments, dealing with things in a better way and making life easier for the other.

Good luck to us. Keep the faith hun, I'd be with you in all circumstances.

None of the great days of my life matters without you...

You know very well how much you mean to me.. Am very thankful that despite the problems that we had in the past few months we're still carefully holding each others hands, tight and sure enough not to let go of the other. You're the better half of me.

Remembering Someone from a Song

I love music. Not a day will pass without me having a specific song for the day.. it sounds weird but, I used to live everyday life listening to songs, especially those from my collections.

I used to associate a certain song to a person. So hearing this song would definitely make me think about this person.

Let me list down some of them.

1. Superman by Five for Fighting - I remember one special person named Berlin. It's his favorite song and t'was once placed as ringing tone on his mobile fone way way before. I miss you Berlin, hope you're happy now and in peace.. watching us all here from above.

2. Smooth by Santana - I remember how my very good friend Jane danced on the dance floor with this live music playing on.. and how she made the vocalist of the band to join her there. Am missin this very sweet friend of mine. Send my kisses to ur little bundle of joy.

3. Heaven Knows (This Angel has Flown) by Orange and Lemons - I remember how Urico cried his heart out (i know, though i didn't see it) when he and his gf broke up. It was a week off from working and settling things over before finally facing a new world without her. Hi Urico, i miss our old days together in the office.

4. If You're not the One by Daniel Beddingfield - I remember one person from the past and how we were trying to make everything alright despite all the odds. Wont forget those huge bunches of long-stemmed yellow roses and boxes of my favorite chocolates. That was very thoughtful from a man with miles and oceans apart from me. You will always be one of my best of friends. Good luck to you and to your family.

5. Beauty and Madness by Fralippo Lippi - a special song dedicated to me from a classmate and very close companion while I was in college..He sang this lovely song while he played the piano. Got an early Valentine greeting from him this morning. This is one of the few people who knows the real me.

6. Let Me by Orange and Lemons - one of my topmost favorites. I was touched how this person surprised me one time, having the lyrics of this song on his hand while driving... and tried to sing this for me. It was not easy though for an Italian. Good luck to your singing career and best wishes to the group on your Valentine show tonight. Am happy for you.

7. I Won't Go Home Without You by Maroon 5 - how can I forget that snowy night? The night I thought I'd bring my things back home. It was a nightmare, seeing him with total disappointment for some "huge mistakes" I've done. But now am glad how things were settled. You know how much I love you and am glad you're holding on tight with me.

Now that it's kinda late on my end, lemme save and post these few songs.

Come Fai a Saperlo

Mi ricordo bene, il giorno che
     sei arrivato nella mia vita
Hai chiesto per mio nome
     Tu hai avuto il sorriso piu bello

La mia vita ha cominciato a cambiare
     Mi vorrei svegliare ogni giorno sentendomi bene
Con te, vicino a me
     Mi fai sentire cose che sicuramente andranno bene

Come fai a sapere che avevo bisogno di
     qualcuno come te nella mia vita
E c'era uno vuoto spazio nel mio cuore
     Tu sei venuto al momento giusto nella mia vita

Non mi dimenticerò mai
     Come hai portato il sole che brilla nella mia vita
E hai preso i tutte le preoccupazioni e le paure
     che avevo

Penso a quello che veramente tentavo di dirti
Non succede ogni giorno che qualcuno come te
     arriva nella mia vita
Non ho parole per esprimere quanto ti amo.

Tell me what happiness is all about

For most people, once they met their basic physical needs of food, shelter, and comfort their life becomes about maximizing happiness. Others seek more meaningful ways in order to feel happier. Pursuing and nurturing relationships so they can experience happiness and love with other people. People work and stretch all their efforts for financial independence in order to do more of what they enjoy. Some other people might also assist others to alleviate suffering in their life through volunteering or charity work. The essence of our pursuits is to increase and enhance the physical and emotional pleasure of life. It can be summed up as the pursuit of happiness.

The challenge is that we often get lost or turned around on our path. We become disappointed as people turn out not to be who we thought. So how can you define your own happiness? Happiness could not be really defined. The happiness of one person could mean suffering for the other.

Relationships can somehow become the source of emotional drama, insecurity and heartbreak. Exciting careers lead to disappointment, disillusionment, and burnout. For some people physical challenges or loss of a loved one causes them to completely re-evaluate what is important in life with the time they have.

Having reached almost the half of life, I've still been searching for the key of my own happiness. I lived my early years with tears, with the feeling of being inferior to all. Then years passed by, I started to deeply knew myself, my strengths and weaknesses. My self-confidence has been gained. Then I completely crawled out from my own dark shell.

I hate being born with intense emotions. I am a prisoner of my own self, being ruled by what my emotion is dictating me. People told me I have a strong personality and I truly believe I do. But when I get caught in certain circumstances having in need to consult the heart, the mind never gets the chance to share its opinion. The heart ruled all the time. And so, all the time I got hurt so bad until the point of surrendering my life.

One quotation says, "If you keep doing what you've always done.. You'll always get what you always got." So the proper logic is, "When you want something you've never had.. You've got to do something you've never done."

Looking back at those years of agony, I cant imagine how I was able to survive. But my life is seems like a loop of pains. Agonies keep on haunting me.

Last night I cried my heart out while I was talking with my friend and he told me, " Haaay Abby, why you seems so unfortunate when it comes to LOVE? You have all the good qualities, you have the beauty and the brain.. But why are you so stupid when you're in love?"

Am not stupid, but am just pretending to be blind and numb of everything so I wont get disappointed and feel sorry when things turn out bad. Am trying to cure all, to do everything to get things better even if this could mean my own pain. For me, happiness is what I feel when I stay with people I love and when I see them contented with what I can give them.

Battling over myself...is something I couldn't get to overcome. This may be an endless tug of war between my heart and mind.

Someday, I wish to see myself having this genuine smile on my face being held on by someone who has this lovely smile at me saying, "No one's gonna hurt you again.."